So, a few nights ago, the Xbox 360 dashboard was cramming the Dragon's Dogma demo down my throat - not that I mind the advertisements. It's nice to know what's coming out, but I'm always interested to see what games are getting a big push.
From a story perspective, I have next to nothing to say about Dragon's Dogma. The glimpse of the story in the demo came across as extremely generic. But there's more to writing than plot. Dragon's Dogma stands out as an example of how bad writing and battle speech design can completely overshadow everything else.
I didn't dislike the game. It had some fun and interesting elements, and I generally like hack-n-slash games. I'm a sucker for powerful character creation. However, all I walked away from the demo with was "Jesus Christ, these people cannot write barks."
You have a dedicated sidekick (or 'pawn') who will not shut the hell up. He (or she, but in the demo, we're stuck with the default guy) has to shout every time he sees a monster. He has to announce what the monster's weaknesses are, how it compares to other monsters, what he's planning to do in the battle, what he wants for dinner, how much money the cobbler charged him for his latest pair of boots, and so on. And none of this is done concisely.
"Look, Master, a goblin!"
"We shall fell them in a single charge!"
"I'll provoke it!"
"It shall feel the heat of my flames!"
"A hobgoblin approaches! These beasts are stronger than the goblins!"
"I shall hold it in place while you deliver the killing blow!"
Every fight becomes a wall of text while your pawn natters endlessly. And because the barks are so long, half the time, the situation is no longer relevant by the time your pawn finishes announcing it. More than once, my pawn was giving his introductory speech about a particular monster while I was already fighting said monster. Thanks, pawn. I noticed there was a hobgoblin approaching. That's why my sword is in him.
And to make matters worse, you're not just expected to haul your pawn. You get two others (that you can rent out from other players or something). And the game does not par down their speech based on how many people are in your party. So every time you see a goblin, three people will simultaneously barf out their commentary on the situation. Trying to parse what everyone is up to in battle is nearly impossible, especially in the more hectic fights. Not to mention that it is just plain annoying to have every scene, fight, and corridor be the subject of multi-line voice clips.
I know that the Dragon's Dogma demo is, well, a demo, but I give the developers no slack for that. Seriously, we have had voice acting in video games for a long time now. Back when six Deus Ex guards would shout out their I-think-I-heard-something lines in tandem, this sort of thing was annoying and silly but somewhat understandable.
It's been over ten years, and we still get subjected to this stuff. Big name developers with big budgets and large QA teams somehow still overlook the fact that long-winded, layering barks are just as annoying in their game as they were in every other game. I thought the incessant repetition of "That's it. Bag 'em, and tag 'em."
in Mass Effect 1 was bad. Dragon's Dogma brings bad bark writing down to a whole new level.
